#HAWMC Day 3 Wordless Wednesday

Today’s Prompt:

• Post a picture that symbolizes your condition and your experiences.

 
Frida Kahlo, Without Hope, (1945)

HAWMC Day 2 – Introductions

 
  Me: Hi, My name is Kat, and I am an illness hoarder. (You: Hi Kat!)

Because I am indecisive and an illness hoarder, I carry not one, but four diagnoses: Crohn's Disease, Fibromyalgia, Depression, and PTSD. They are all rather lovely, and I coudn't decide, so I chose them all! Haha.

This year marks my 2nd participation with HAWMC, and my 2nd year as a health activist. I'm not a formal activist in the sense that I'm bringing about anything other than awareness to my illnesses, via my blog. My writing makes me a health activist.

I write about my health because it helps raise awareness about: Crohn’s Disease, Fibromyalgia, Depression, and PTSD,  from a personal perspective, that goes beyond the “textbook case” of the diseases, by humanizing them. These chronic, debilitating, life-threatening illnesses don't just affect the body, but the whole person, and even beyond the person, the person’s surroundings, loved ones, friends. So far writing has been a cathartic experience for me. The ease with which I have written these pieces has surprised me, as it tells me that I have kept my feelings bottled up for far too long. The fact that these pieces flow out of me so easily reinforces my decision to write about my health. I have something to say that needs to be told. I have been silent for far too long, which has affected my mental health. Repressing my feelings is one of the symptoms of my depression. It is my hope that I can begin the healing process by writing about my health, to help me get closure on what I’ve been through in the past, as well as to help me grow.



I write about my health because it helps me connect with others.  I’ve tried to be as open as possible, in the hopes that others can relate to what I’m going through. To help them see that they are not alone, to help ME see that I’M not alone. To not only raise awareness, but HOPE. The responses and support I’ve received thus far have been great. I’ve heard from fellow Crohnies who find something in what I’ve written to which they can relate, which then opens up a discussion. And by talking about what we are going through, we begin the healing process. We see that we are not alone, we help each other cope, we feel hope, we feel encouraged, and the healing process is set in motion.



Some of my old posts that I feel capture my  identity as a Health Activist and about my condition,
include the following:

• #HAWMC Day 2: Quotation Inspiration  - in which I reflect on my ability to "give myself good advice but seldom follow it." 

• #HAWMC Day 3: Superpower - Fearlessness - in which I reflect on what it takes to be fearless, and realize that those of us who are chronically ill, already are.

• #HAWMC Day 5: Ekphrasis Post - in which I reflect on having looked death in the face because of complications following a surgery to treat my Crohn's disease.  

• #HAWMC Day 18: Open Book- in which I reflect on being vulnerable, and why that is such a challenge for me. 

• HAWMCDay20: There Is No Miracle Cure- in which I reflect upon there being no miracle cure for my illnesses, specifically Crohn's Disease, and all the feelings that arise as a result of living with an incurable disease. 

 ” I write because there is a voice within me that will not be still.” - Sylvia Plath



I too have a voice within me that demands to be heard. We all have a voice, we all have our stories, and we deserve to be heard. I choose to use my experience as a tool to transform myself and grow. And each day I feel myself growing stronger and transforming into a chronically awesome individual who amongst other things, happens to have a chronic illness. I am discovering my gifts and talents. I have a chronic illness, but it does not have me. And that is a very powerful feeling.